I remember when I was a senior in high school and it was that time of year where everyone was applying to colleges and pretty much making the choices that would affect the rest of their future. I knew I wanted to go to beauty school...but that was about it. I started to realize, as I was deciding where to go, that I would probably be alone. All my friends were applying to places where they could room together. It seemed I was the only one staying home to go to school. I thought seriously about going to a beauty school where ever my friends went so I could at least room with them. I prayed and prayed, asking where I should go. When I got my answer I wasn't pleased. I needed to stay here and go to the community college for beauty school. I remember crying for days. Sounds dramatic, but really I was so sad. I was so caught up in the fact that I wasn't going to be with my friends, I didn't take the time to think that maybe the Lord has a different plan for me that is better. I wanted the same plan as my friends. I even remember the first night they all moved away. My best friend called me and all I could hear was people in the background talking and laughing. My heart just sunk. Not only was I feeling alone because my friends had moved away, but I had also been struggling for a while with some choices I had to make and ended up breaking up with my boyfriend of 2 years at the time. Life couldn't have been more lonely. I asked my dad and bishop for priesthood blessings. So many blessings, comforts, promises. I heard it but I didn't seem to believe that all would be well. That I would make new friends. That I would be a mother and wife in Zion someday. That I would be ok. The Lord had a different plan for me. And with much humbling I was able to realize that that plan was far better then the plan I wanted. Sometimes it's easy to forget that the Lord really does know best. He can see the bigger picture. We can't. So why not put all trust in Him. Pride. Failure. Fear. If only we could always remember and have full faith in Him we wouldn't have pride, fear of failure, fear of stepping into the unknown. I ended up getting a scholarship which paid for my entire schooling. Blessing. I made new friends and to this day are some of the people I cherish most. Blessing. I went on my first date with my husband now, after a week into school. Married that Spring. Blessing. I was able to find a job without any complications to get me through college, that I had for two years. Blessing. We we're able to buy a home after a year of being married. Blessing. I have had the opportunity to serve in many callings in my wards. Blessing. I have a sweet baby boy. Blessing. We have been given a grant that pays for the amount I would have made if I work so I can be home with my baby boy. HUGE blessing. (Coincidence, I think not.) I have been blessed beyond measure. I never dreamed that when I was given the answer that I needed to stay home and go to school that it was really because I needed to get married and start a family. The Lord has a plan for each of us. And He doesn't promise that we can see the out come. But He does promise that He will stand by us. All times. As long as we put our faith in Him.
"Oh why you look so sad
The tears are in your eyes
The tears are in your eyes
Come on and come to me now
Don’t be ashamed to cry
Let me see you through
Cause I’ve seen the dark side too
When the night falls on you
You don't know what to do
Nothing you confess
Could make me love you less
I’ll stand by you
I’ll stand by you
Won’t let nobody hurt you
I’ll stand by you
So if you're mad get mad
Don’t hold it all inside
Come on and talk to me now
Hey, what you got to hide
I get angry too
Well I’m a lot like you
When you're standing at the crossroads
And don't know which path to choose
Let me come along
Cause even if you're wrong
I’ll stand by you
I’ll stand by you
Won’t let nobody hurt you
I’ll stand by you
Take me in into you darkest hour
And I’ll never desert you
I’ll stand by you
And when, when the night falls on you, baby
You feeling all alone
You won't be on your own
I’ll stand by you
I’ll stand by you
Won’t let nobody hurt you
I’ll stand by you
Take me in into you darkest hour
And I’ll never desert you
I’ll stand by you
Oh I’ll stand by you
I’ll stand by you"
(The Pretenders)
Lesson Learned:
"Yea, I know that I am nothing; as to my strength I am weak; therefore I will not boast of myself, but I will boast of my God, for in His strength I can do all things..." (Alma 26:12)
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